The new year brought many things to my attention—including last semester’s average grade report. I groaned as I looked over the paper. I wasn’t failing. I would even say it was great—for someone who didn’t turn in homework. I turned the paper and cringed, thinking of my parents’ punishment. Force me to come straight home after school? I’d rather avoid that happening.
“Hey, Dani!” Allison materialized out of nowhere and attempted to hang onto my arm like she did whenever I was already having a bad day. Like a shark smelling blood. “Miss me? I sent you texts last week. Did you get them?”
“There were texts? Oops.” She must be referring to the random pictures of trees and animals and the “Just saying hi” messages that I received between the hours of 9 p.m. and 3 a.m. Those stayed on my phone all of ten seconds before being deleted. Blocking her was tempting.
She leaned closer. “Grades got you down? Let’s go to Emelia’s.”
“Nope. Going home to study.”
She scrunched her nose. “What? No, that’s boring.”
“So is being grounded. I’m sure you would know.”
“Don’t worry. I have plans to take care of it. I thought we would get help from a certain recovering public schooler who happened to be the top of her class, back when she actually attended school.”
“Wait, what?” Now that she mentioned it, I do remember the scratching of a pencil going silent in front of me before I would get halfway through a test. I resented when she leaned on her elbows to wait out the rest of class. “How do you know that?”
“Talking. Emelia and I use words.” She placed a hand on her heart. “Don’t worry. I haven’t told anyone about our tragic love story. That’s our secret for now.”
“Please, I can’t take it any longer,” I begged to the unseen forces controlling my life.
“I agree. Let’s go! Don’t you miss her?”
“I just saw her,” I said without thinking.
Her confusion changed to a grin that threatened to split her face in two. Well, there’s your Christmas present. Enjoy.
“You went on your own?” Then she gasped. “Was it for Christmas? I bet you went in all heroic and—”
Change of subject, change of subject— “Okay, fine! Let’s go!”
She jogged to keep up with my quickened pace. “Aw, you’re embarrassed about it! How cute.”
Her rant didn’t even stop when we got on our bikes. I did my best to pedal far enough ahead not to be associated with her.
We walked into the house and barely said our greetings before Allison launched a hug at Emelia. She tensed, similar to how one might defend against a charging bear. Except she was more flustered than afraid for her safety—I think.
I felt sympathy and tugged light on Allison’s hood. “Down.”
Allison released her and clasped her own hands together. “Sorry! I’m affectionate. I can’t help it. I’ve missed you.”
Emelia cleared her throat. “You’re fine. How were your holidays?”
Allison began to tell her all about her aunts and uncles in the south and showed her many of the same pictures she had sent me. Emelia nodded and said, “That’s cool” whenever prompted. Allison is intentionally obtuse about how little people care. They are the perfect duo. Allison never stops talking and Emelia seems content to listen.
After picture forty-six, Allison put her phone away. “Anyway, now that school is back, we were wondering if you could help us out. Dani is worried about failing and I could use some brushing up. Sophomore year was a blur.”
“My help?” She asked. “I am not that great.”
“Oh, stop being humble. What’s your best subject?”
Her awkward fidgeting, squeezing her own hands, increased. “Well, English, I guess?”
Allison and I looked at each other and then back at Emelia. For once, we were thinking the same thing. Was it my fault all my English teachers sucked?
She withered under our stares. “W—what?”
“I knew we met for a reason. You must help us. I have a report due, like, yesterday and I have no clue how to start,” Allison said.
She let go of her own fingers and waved her hands, like maybe she could vanquish our praise. “I’m really not—”
“You’ve been keeping up with the work on your own, right? Look, we’re not going to force you or anything,” I emphasized with a side glance to Allison, who pouted. “But if you have free time, it would be cool.”
“I guess... As much as I help, I can try?”
“Great. I'm sure we can offer some of our own assistance. Ya know. I'm pretty sure Alli is decent at physics, but it will probably be a while before you have to deal with that.”
She started to say something at that, but then closed her mouth. If she was going to say that she had already mastered physics, I was seriously going to have problems with her.
“And you and I were in the same grade, if you don't understand anything, I can show you how the teacher described it. Are there any areas you are struggling with?”
She ducked her head and shifted her eyes to the side. Is that your way of saying that you have no problem areas, while still trying to look humble? “...I'm not very good at math...”
“Okay. This works out great. That's my best subject. What was your average?”
“About ninety percent...”
...You know that isn't even bad enough to be considered bad, right?
Allison laughed. “If that's bad, I'm scared of what you will think of my grades. All right, help me out here.”
Allison pulled a book out of her bag and flipped through it while she explained her project. Emelia set up an outline for her to follow and gave some tips.
“You're just in the tenth grade, right? And I'm a senior. How do you know all this stuff? You're so smart!”
Emelia looked down from Allison’s book to her hands. I guess I would be annoyed if she were arrogant about it, but what makes her that insecure when she has so much going for her? “No, I am not really,” she deflected. “I just study. That is all.”
I’ll ignore her unspoken “unlike everyone else.” Ouch.
“It's kind of a miracle I made it this far. I think my teachers passed me because they didn't want to deal with me,” Allison said. “It's a good thing I only have to graduate. Then I'm done.”
“You're not going to college?”
“Nope. Why, are you judging me?” She smirked. I think she just enjoys teasing her to watch her reactions.
“No! No, I'm sorry! I was just curious. I would never—I know there are lots of different—People can—” So, there’s a good reason why she thinks for a long time before speaking. I am beginning to suspect that she would never complete a sentence if she didn’t.
Allison laughed and the sound of it echoed in the large room. She did enjoy that. “Relax. You’re fine. I don’t need to go. My aunt dropped out of college to take care of me. When I start supporting myself, maybe she can keep her nose on her own problems.”
Emelia expressed her condolences and they somehow moved into a conversation about family and growing up without what people call normalcy. I felt a little lost between the two of them. It was difficult for me to try to communicate with either of them. How were they able to talk to each other with relative ease? Did that mean the problem was with me?
Fine, I could do this too. “What about you? Are you planning to go to college?” I asked Emelia during a lull in the conversation.
Her smile fell into contemplation. (Again, why me?) “I always wanted to, but…”
“Do you miss school?” Allison asked.
She nodded. “I do. Yeah.”
“Weirdo. Well careful, you know that if you stay out too long, they might make you repeat a year. I would know.” Allison attempted to joke, but we lost her to her thoughts again.
See, I’m great at conversation. Real natural flow.
I felt that familiar irritation build in me, but it wasn’t directed at anything Emelia did. I was frustrated with myself. And I hated sitting in that feeling.
“You need to get out,” I said when we were leaving. “Can you meet us at three tomorrow, in front of the school?”
“Someone might see—” she started.
“Rule number one of surviving high school: no one is paying attention to you. I just wanna show you something, but it’s your choice. I’ll see you at the bike racks.”
As predicted, Allison harassed me for an explanation when we made it back to the road. I found myself grinning instead of groaning. I didn’t know what I was planning. But I knew I didn’t want her to miss out on all her experiences. If Emelia trusted me, then I would figure something out.
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