“I’m not stepping foot in there,” Beatrice snarled as Lisha teleported them both to the front of The Heart Attack Grill.
“C’mon babe,” Lisha said, jumping up and down. “It was my turn to pick date night!”
“You’re going to force me to go in there,” she hissed.
Only a couple minutes later, Lisha was forcing Beatrice through the door. It wasn’t hard since Lisha had ten times her muscle mass. She got them both a place to sit and took their seats. Beatrice was making it very clear how much she didn’t want to be there though.
“Even the servers are fat,” she said crassly as soon as their waitress was in earshot. She was in a nurse outfit and didn't have as large of a waistline as Beatrice was trying to shame her for.
“Can I take your order?”
“I want to go home-”
“A Quadruple Bypass Burger challenge,” Lisha burted daringly.
“And for you, ma’am,” the waitress asked with a smile, turning to Beatrice.
“Do I look like I eat your kind of food?” she growled. The nurse understood and just walked away in a hurry.
“Babe, you need to lighten up,” Lisha laughed. “It’s not a date night if you don’t eat too.”
“I’m already getting enough calories just inhaling the grease fumes.”
* * * * *
“And she’s finished!” the waitress announced.
“Woo!” Lisha cheered, finishing the last bit of burger as Beatrice just sat aside, disgusted that everyone was turning it into a whole spectacle. “That was amazing!”
“That was sickening,” Beatrice corrected.
“Can I have another?” she asked, turning to the waitress. The lady froze up.
“You want… another…?”
“Mhm,” she nodded happily.
“O-ok,” the waitress said, hesitantly and nervously walking away.
“I know you have like three hearts or something,” Beatrice sighed. “But you’re going to have a heart attack.”
“Nah, carvations can eat more than normal people,” Lisha waved off.
“You’ve eaten more than a whale does in a week. Even the waitress gave you a funny look, and it’s her job to give people cardiac arrest.”
“You’re too much of a stick in the mud,” she said, rolling her eyes.
* * * * *
After Lisha’s third Quadruple Bypass Burger, she definitely felt different. Something in her heart and under her shoulder blades was kind of feeling funny. She called the waitress over, who looked down fearfully.
“Ma’am, I don’t think-”
“I just want a milkshake to go,” Lisha interrupted. “It’s for my sister. She’s crazy for them but won’t admit it.”
“Ok, miss, one minute.”
“You really don’t look ok,” Beatrice said once the server was gone. “You’re making really funny faces.”
“I’m-”
Lisha stopped mid sentence and fell out of her chair. Beatrice was fairly sure that regular doctors wouldn’t be able to do anything for her. Right as she dialed Iris though, Beatrice started feeling her heart hurting.
“You're… fucking not giving me a heart attack…” Beatrice groaned, clutching her chest.
* * * * *
“Lisha, c’mon, really?” Iris asked, standing over Lisha and Beatrice in dual hospital beds.
“It was worth it,” she grinned. “Annnnnd…” Lisha waved her hand and summoned a big vanilla milkshake. “I got you something too.”
“Lisha…” Iris groaned. She looked around carefully and swiped it from her. “For later.”
“Hehehehe,” Lisha giggled.
“You’re never fucking deciding where we go for date night again,” Beatrice hissed. “I didn’t even eat and you managed to give me a heart attack!!”
“Well excuse me if I didn’t want to go to another salad bar,” Lisha snarled. “I like to eat real food every once in a while.”
“Whatever you put in your body was not food.”
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