“Baaabe, I got something for you!” Lisha cheered, carrying a couple bags full of food.
“If it’s not my salt and vinegar chips, then go back to the store,” Beatrice hissed from the couch. “It’s my once a month treat!”
“I think you’ll like what I’ve got even better,” Lisha promised, taking a fruit out of the bag and tossing it over the couch, hitting Beatrice in the head.
“What is this?!”
“It’s diet fruit,” Lisha explained happily. “Turns out diet culture spread to The Village, so my people have been growing fruit to lose weight and body fat.”
“Huh, really?” Beatrice asked, looking at the fruit in her hands.
“Mhm. It sounded like something you’d be interested in. So while I was visiting I grabbed a few for you. They’re bitter, but… you don’t seem to mind that flavor.”
“If it’s diet magic, I can give it a try,” she shrugged, taking a bite and laying back down. “Maybe you guys finally made useful food.”
“Just tell me if you want more,” Lisha giggled with an innocent smile. “I’ll get you as much as you want!”
The truth was that the fruit Lisha gave Beatrice was magic, but not diet. It was a regular carvation fruit, which was packed to the brim with calories. Lisha just watched innocently as Beatrice finished the fruit and even asked for a second.
* * * * *
Two Weeks Later
“Babe, do you think I put on weight?” Beatrice asked, greatly distressed while putting on her designer jeans, which felt noticeably tighter than normal.
“I think you look good,” responded Lisha with a thumbs up.
“That’s not what I asked,” she growled. She finally got the jeans on, but she admittedly had to suck it in.
“Maybe we can go clothes shopping this weekend!” Lisha suggested.
“What the hell made me gain so much…” Beatrice mumbled. “Was it all the salad…?”
“I wouldn’t worry so much about it. Maybe the jeans just shrank?”
“You’re not fooling me. I’ll just cut out everything but the diet fruit. Maybe the magic weight loss only works if I eat just the fruit?”
“Maybe,” Lisha innocently shrugged. She looked at the clock and shoved a few fruit into a bag before pushing it into Beatrice’s hands. “You’re late for work! Go on, and make sure to not just eat the fruit!”
“I don’t need anything but the fruit, babe,” Beatrice sassed, teleporting away.
“If you insist,” Lisha said with a devious grin and giggle.
* * * * *
One Month Later
“Lisha!” Beatrice shouted in a half-sob. “Lisha, where are you?!”
Beatrice had been in denial about gaining weight, but she couldn’t kid herself that the addictive “diet fruit” that Lisha had given her were really working like she said they would. As of that morning, the only pants that fit Beatrice were her sweatpants. It made her feel furious, heartbroken, and depressed.
“Hey babe,” Lisha said, popping out of the kitchen. “What’s-”
“Don’t ask what’s up!” Beatrice fumed. “You-”
“Woah, calm down! Here,” She grabbed a fruit from the bowl and held it out to Beatrice. “Have a fruit. It’ll make you feel-”
“Don’t give me fruit!” Beatrice screamed, swatting her hand. “I know you’ve been using them to fatten me up! My waistline’s bigger than what Fluffy can wrap around!”
“I think you’re exaggerating-”
“Don’t tell me I’m exaggerating! I only fit in fucking sweatpants and you want me to believe I’m exaggerating?! I think you need to get your eyes checked!”
“Ok, fine, the fruit weren’t diet,” Lisha admitted. “But look at you! You’re so adorable! So curvy and cute!”
“I don’t need to be curvy! I need to be thin!”
“Says who?” she frowned.
“Says me,” Beatrice growled. Lisha could see her eyeing the fruit bowl behind her.
“Do you want one more, or-”
“One last fat fruit,” she snapped, snatching one from the bowl. “Only because these taste fucking great. Get this flavor in a protein bar or some actual diet shit.”
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