A few hours later, paper, clothes, and books muddled the floor of my master bedroom. I took another item out of my drawer and threw it over my shoulder to join the rest of the mess. I couldn’t find the ring, and I wondered if I should use it for the proposal.
My grandfather proposed to my grandmother with the ring, and then my grandmother gave it to my father to propose to my mother. My father couldn’t afford an engagement ring at age eighteen, and since my father had passed away, Mama had no use for it. Therefore, she continued the little family-tradition and gave the ring to me before I left for college in case I needed to pop the question. I rammed through the smaller items in my chest drawer and then pondered if the ring sat in a case or not.
“Where are you, beautiful ring?” I whispered. “You wonderful ring,” I flirted. I sorted through the less used items: batteries, old remotes, bankbooks, and pens and pencils in the top.
I examined the unpleasant mess. It was almost time, and I needed the ring and a broom to reorganize my bedroom before Janice happened to come snooping upstairs. Already, she never liked my earth tone theme bedroom—it made her feel as if we lied inside of a grave. She preferred vibrant bright colors like yellow, sky blue, gray to dark colors like maroon, brown, and green. The forest green walls, beige curtains, and brown carpet resembled a forest theme. Mama crocheted a flower pattern quilt with green, gold, and bronze colors and mailed it to me a few years ago.
Nevertheless, sleeping among nature relaxed me and soothed my inner soul. My body trembled, and sweat formed on my brow as thoughts danced within me; thoughts of my inner peace and plant collection tossed out on to the curb moments after pledging I do to Janice.
My stomach heaved with fear. But I wiped my brow, forged my way through the doubt, and continued the ring search. I convinced Janice to stop by on short notice. I removed the junk drawer from the dresser and poured everything onto the floor. A big crash rang, and I squinted my eyes to bear the noise. If the ring hid inside, it probably relocated to the floor. Determined, I fiddled through each thing-a-bob and placed each item back into the drawer. Suddenly, a tiny black box underneath coins, screws, and a pencil froze me.
My heart filled with joy as my hands quickly snatched it and examined the gold letters, M.K., which stood for May Kole, my grandmother’s name. My thumb popped the case open, and the uniquely odd ring sparkled. It had a gold rim with greenish yellow rubies, and it mostly resembled a moon ring.
“I thought you were bigger,” I said to the ring, “but I hope she likes you.” I kissed it, giving it my best of luck. While bent down on one knee, I practiced. I held the ring up into the air with both hands attached to it and said, “Janice Marie Wilson, I realized how important you are to me in my life. Therefore, would you be my wife?” I paused, embracing the silence in my bedroom and imagining her crying and jumping into my arms. I practiced my happy smile, my excited smile, and my sincere smile as if Janice stood in front of me.
After a few seconds, I giggled to myself for talking to an imaginary Janice.
Ding Dong.
The doorbell rang, and my heart skipped a few beats. I quickly got off my knees, hid the ring in my back pocket, and took one last disappointing look at the mess in my bedroom. I exhaled and rushed down the stairs and to the front door. I admired Janice’s beautiful frame on the porch through the window’s curtains, nervous to see her beautiful brown dimpled face. My sweaty hands held the doorknob tight, ready to start the mission when I noticed the three unlit candles on the dining room table.
My eyes widened as my feet tiptoed to the table dressed with red cloth, fine silverware, and three tall skinny candles in the middle. Candles lit, I waved my hands over them trying to spread the cinnamon scent. Back at the front door where my sweaty hand grasped the knob, I took deep breath. I opened the door slowly and greeted Janice with a welcoming Kole smile engraved on my face, but she folded her arms and tilted her head to the side.
“Took you long enough,” she said.
She’s small and petite with kinky black hair and beautiful lips.
Speechless from admiring her natural beauty, I opened the door wide enough for her to enter. She slowly walked inside and saw the romantic setup to her left. Immediately, her eyes twinkled, and she thrust out her chest as she gazed at the glimmering table, set with red linen and napkins, and shining wine glasses.
“What is this for?” Curiosity fluttered within her mind.
“It’s to say I appreciate you.” Her fingers roamed on top of the table, and she entered the kitchen. I followed behind her like a lost puppy. She stared at the two bowls filled with food on the kitchen counter.
“So, you cooked dinner for me?” She lifted the top off a pot on the stove. Nervous to answer wrong, I said, “Just heating up some mashed potatoes.” I blushed. “I sort of did something.”
She squinted at me from behind her shoulders, and her eyes fell upon the trashcan, which revealed the red and white Kentucky Fried Chicken bowl inside.
“Go figure.” She stormed out of the kitchen, but I caught her before she made it to the front door.
“Babe, look. I did this for you. Only you. I wanted you to feel special.” I gave her that Kole family smile, the one that caught her eyes when we first met and the one that she fell in love with but it did not work.
“Wellington, you say this every time.” And then she became weak as if she couldn’t stand. I quickly grabbed the chair from the table and sat her down.
“Here. Drink this.” Grabbing the red wine, I poured it into a glass and handed it to her. She wrinkled her forehead but took it and sipped.
“Welly, I can’t do this with you anymore.” She forced out the words before coughing again. I rubbed her back as I lowered myself to gaze into her eyes.
“Janice, baby. I know I am not the best man to pick when it comes to relationships, but I love you, and I can’t see myself living without you.” Moving closer to touch her thigh, I stared hopelessly into her eyes. I swayed on to one knee. “I started to realize how much you mean to me in my life.”
“Oh, Wellington, cut the crap. If I did, then why didn’t you visit me in the hospital? You didn’t even stop by.” Janice took another sip and crossed her legs.
“Janice, I told you I had a work thing.”
“Yeah. A work thing.” She sneered while creating bunny ears as if I lied. I shot up on to my feet and paced around.
“Janice, I took on a few research projects because I thought Dr. Frazier was going to give me a promotion if I did. I had to stay late and complete the work, babe,” I pleaded and swayed back on one knee. “And, baby, I regret not coming to see you in the hospital that day, but you’re alright? It was a small asthma attack, right? You didn’t need me there, but if I could go back in time, I would have left that stupid work on my desk and came.”
“You say that now.” She glared.
I held her hand in mine and took a deep breath, and said, “Janice, I realized that you mean so much to me and—”
“And what? Want me to help you with another scientific project that will leave me tired, drained, and stressed out.” She twisted her head to the side, and the muscle in my jaw twitched as my mouth curved into a smile.
“It was a simple project with plants, babe.” I scowled.
“Plants are boring.” She stuck her tongue out and then smirked.
“You’re childish.” I scorned and then forced a smile. She giggled and battered her lashes and my smile became genuine.
I grabbed one of her hands again. “Can you please let me finish?”
She nodded as she sipped the wine I wished I had never given to her. I took a deep breath and hopelessly romantically said, “Janice, you mean the world to me. I know I haven’t been the best man in your life, but from this day forward, I promise to be the better man in your life. That will provide for you, put you first, and be the father of our future children. Therefore . . . ” I reached in my back pocket, and her eyes grew as I revealed the engagement ring. “Will you do the same for me and be my wife?” The Kole’s famous smile beamed, and Janice’s heart fluttered.
“Oh, Wellington.” She caressed my cheek. “Are you serious?” Tears formed as she admired me. Suddenly her face went blank as she said, “Umm, I don’t know, Wellington?” she released my cheeks. Her mood changed quickly.
“What do you mean? I love you.”
“I know, but.” She frowned at the ring still between my two fingers.
“Look, the ring was passed down from my grandmother to my mother and now to you . . . if you accept. I promise to buy you a better-looking one.” My heart palpitated.
“No, it’s not the ring.” She squeezed herself from between the chair and me, and I flew to my feet to read her mixed emotions.
“Well, if it’s not the ring, then is it another he?”
“No, it’s just . . . nothing.” She gently pushed me away.
“No, it’s something, Janice. Tell me, please.” My eyebrows knitted, and she fidgeted with her clothes.
“Welly, when I came here today, I planned to break things off completely.” She hid her face and quivered with fear.
My forehead wrinkled. “You’re going to throw three years away like that?” My nostril flared as she searched for the nearest exit.
She stuttered. “It’s time I put myself first and—” she stumbled over her words, and I crossed my arms.
“Oh, my goodness Janice. It was one mistake!” Every muscle tensed in my body.
“I should go.” Janice rushed to the front door, and my hand slammed it shut.
“Wait. You can’t leave. . . not like this.” Tears formed and Janice finally revealed herself to me.
“Welly? I’m sick.” Her hands quickly clutched her mouth, and she sobbed. A train blasted through and wrecked my mind when she said those words. I paused and then my body naturally embraced her. A familiar pain of loss developed in my chest.
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