That is the question.
I mean is it better to try and build a stronger foundation before birth, becoming a super baby? Or is it safer to stay as I am and grow naturally? Maybe here all babies are born super.
Is it better to keep it simple and not stand out or should I stand up and face the world as strong as I can be? Yet if I don't do something in here surely I will go mad. I need something to focus on, to hold to. For however long this may take.
But by standing out at birth might I not end up getting hammered down?
出る釘は打たれる.
To die once more, perchance to sleep again, and still yet may be reborn once more.
But what to spend them on.
I don’t think spending them on strength would be a good idea because I could hurt my mother moving.
Dexterity has no use to me here because I can’t move anywhere and I don’t know what it’s going to be like when I’m born. Though when I’m born is it going to be dangerous? Hopefully not.
Everything seems to be okay here but I’ve got another 3 to 9 months, an appallingly vague assumption, waiting here and there’s not a lot I can do.
Magic? Again don’t want to cause any problems and who knows what fire, ice, air, earth or simply some form of magical energy might do to me in here, let alone my mother.
Clarity, mind and senses seem like the only stats that I can change without leading to some form of disaster. But again there is no guarantee and I simply do not know enough and so my conscience or simple overthinking makes me a coward of me and I lose the will to act.
Maybe I will be able to take the risk at a later date, but for now, for when it all seems so novel and new, and completely bewildering, I will wait to make a decision. Lest I become more than discombobulated in mind but body as well.
The paradox is that by not choosing I'm still making a choice.
My choice is I’ve decided I’m not going to spend any of these points.
Ultimately being informed is more important than being ignorant and I just don’t know what I’m doing or what I’m going to need.
I don’t want to cause problems whilst I’m here in a womb.
In any case, my stats seem to be improving naturally as I am growing here anyway so maybe saving them for when I stop growing or in an emergency is the best choice I can make.
I choose to save rather than spend.
Having got my time sense skill, it seems to have added itself to my stats list and I don’t need to count every second for it to continue to add my age although not too accurately yet.
But I found out that by counting for another 2 hours I can continue to level up my time sense ability. My skill is still at level two so not quite enough experience to move my overall level up to level two.
My main problem is that I am still falling asleep far too quickly and way before I can count up to 14,400 at the moment. 4 hours of concentration seems to be a little too much for my baby brain. I will have to wait for my stamina to improve.
Right, so other than counting and keeping track of time.
My next question is what else can I do for an hour at a time.
The only thing I can think of and something I never had enough time for in my first life is meditation.
Breathe in then breathe out.
That doesn’t work out too well for me at the moment. Meditation seems to be a lot harder to do if you are focusing on your breathing when you’re not actually breathing. Try it out sometime because that’s how it feels at the moment. Somehow it still feels comfortable to be under that pressure but it makes it challenging to focus on an in and out motion without breathing in and breathing out.
Without that to focus on what is next easiest to focus on, keeping track of time and I’ve done that.
Let's try meditation again can I get rid of all my thoughts and just feel…
. . .
Managed it for a second but there is just so much noise bubbling all around me.
and
. . .
Well
. . .
It's a little boring!
Still, I’m going to keep trying. It took me several tries to get the time sense skill so it will take some time to get the meditation. What doesn’t take much is for me to fall asleep.
Or daydream.
As I lie here with my eyes closed counting I keep wondering what else I can do? How can I get another skill or gain more experience? The only other thing I can do is listen to my mother’s heartbeat.
Right, that’s it!
By the time I’m born I am going to be a super counter and a super listener. Can I do both at the same time? Just listen to my mother’s heartbeat and count it.
Lub dub, lub dub,
1, 2, 3, 4
Lub dub lub dub
5, 6, 7, 8
Lub dub lub dub
3,599, 3,600
Bingo!
Listening is now Lv1!
Although my Time sense has yet to level again, I've managed to get to Level 2!
Just keep counting,
Just keep listening.
What do we do?
We level.
Or at least that's what I hope I will be able to keep doing. Otherwise, it is going to be a long gestation period for me!
Level: 2 Experience: 0/400 Age: 2 days
Health: 20/20 Stamina: 7/7 Mana 10/10
Vitality: 2
Endurance: 1
Strength: 0
Dexterity: 0
Senses: 3
Mind: 47
Clarity: 1
Magic: 1
Free Points 20
Skills: Time sense (LV 2) Listening (LV 1)
Can I level two skills at the same time?
. . .
When was the last time you listened to someone? Listened, without thinking about what you were going to say in reply? Or waiting for your turn to talk?
Unfortunately, that is all I can do at the moment.
What’s worse I can’t even understand what they are saying. I’m literally listening to her heart and her guts, as well as mine. But literally and figuratively I’m still in the dark. The only one I can understand, listen to and talk to is myself.
I’m continuing to count, continuing to listen and those are the only things that I can do at the moment. This morning, I thought I could hear my mother’s voice.
I’m not sure at what point the cochlear develops in the womb but words and sounds seem to be becoming clearer. I guess maybe I’ve been feeling her heartbeat more than hearing it but now I can hear my mother’s voice and she is singing.
Singing to me maybe.
Does she even know that I’m here? Will she have noticed? How long does it take for a baby to be aware? How long does it take a woman to be aware of a baby? I mean premature babies can survive, but from what age can they survive, and at what point does consciousness begin?
Maybe it is simply because my listening skill has levelled that I can hear her. Sound being fairly muffled in here, easily half as loud as it would be outside.
Also, interestingly enough, my endurance, strength and dexterity all gained 1 stat overnight.
I’m growing and my stats seem to be growing with me.
I wonder when they will stop or if they ever stop. Will adding in my free points support or stunt my growth? There are just so many things I don’t know so best to leave it to nature for now. Anyway, back to the singing or humming, not a hundred per cent sure which it is, what with my ears underwater and still under development.
That said, I think it sounds beautiful.
Even if, it still doesn’t make sense.
It is quite clearly not English, French or Spanish it doesn’t sound like a Slavic language but I was never very good at those. It’s not German, Japanese, Korean or Chinese but is pleasant to listen to.
Hopefully, I will get another skill from listening in. Maybe a musical appreciation skill. I’m not quite sure what skill I would get and my listening skill needed to be done for at least an hour before I got that. Plus, she isn’t singing for two hours at a time, maybe I could give a kick whenever she stops. But I suppose if it adds up over time maybe in a week or two I will be able to level it up. Besides, I think I am still too small for a kick to be felt right now.
As for my day today, I know it must be day as she is moving around a lot so obviously, it’s daytime that or she sleepwalks. Anyway, she’s up and about, physically moving and yes I think I’m upside down again right now. I know you need to be upside down, later on, to be born so maybe I’ll just stay this way round.
Not that I’m being particularly successful at turning around and I don’t know whether I am to be born soon or later. I still have a fair amount of space and without too much pressure on me or rather all around me it will probably be later rather than sooner.
Right back to this meditation school of mine. I’m going to get it somehow. Without being able to concentrate on my breath I’m going to focus on a heartbeat. Mine is too quick to relax as it feels like I’m sprinting all the time at the speed it is going. Paying attention to my mother’s heartbeat which is slower and louder seems to be the way to go. 3,600 seconds later, with a fair few detours into dreams, I still don’t have it.
Could be a lack of being able to focus on breathing and it is difficult to stop thinking about what life will be like but I’m going to persevere. I’ll try again tomorrow or maybe later tonight.
One of the things that make it hard to try and get is the fact that I’m moving or being moved around so much and the fact that I’m upside down half the time. I’ll try again tonight when she stops moving. Hopefully, I will be lying down rather than being upside down and I’ll see if I can’t get it then.
Today’s highlights are that I have time sense up to level 3 and listening up to level 2!
Then I finally got my meditation skill!
It took most of last night before she started getting up again and moving around but I now have meditation level one and that’s enough to put me up to an overall level three. I think I’ve been aware on and off for a week now although time sense says it has only been three days since I got a system.
Got to keep grinding the skills that I have, counting the seconds, listening to my mother and meditating the nights away.
The best result from today though is that my health has shot up to 30 when I got a point in vitality and my mana shot up to 20 when I gained a point in magic. Stamina has made it to 17 as I gained a point in strength and dexterity. Not quite sure how the physical stats impact one another. The stats for Mind and Senses continue to grow the most perhaps through leveling related skills.
Level: 3 Experience: 0/800 Age: 3 days
Health: 30/30 Stamina: 17/17 Mana: 20/20
Vitality: 3
Endurance: 1
Strength: 1
Dexterity: 1
Senses: 3
Mind: 48
Clarity: 2
Magic: 2
Free Points: 30
Skills: Time sense (LV 3) Listening (LV 2) Meditation (LV 1)
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