In order to put his thoughts in order, the young Yaksha had moved away from the blond. Aether didn't even try to stop him, he simply watched him in complete silence before returning to his original position.
Neither of them knew how to define the atmosphere around them, it wasn't heavy or tense, but they couldn't say it was pleasant either. But they were also aware that there was an invisible gap between the two and that it would not be easy to break.
On the other hand, the adeptus was annoyed with himself as he had shown himself vulnerable to the blond. The wall he had been forging for so many years was shattered. His voice, his touch, that gaze filled with a layer of sadness; they were Xiao's greatest weakness. She was also afraid; afraid because she could give in to any request Aether made of her.
There was nothing else in the world that could unsettle him like that.
He felt weak.
The water of the stream flowed calmly, a few fish watched from the crystal clear surface. The soft sound that the current produced, mixed with the rest of nature, relaxed him somehow.
He closed his eyes for a few seconds, taking a deep breath and tried to accommodate all his thoughts. It was just the two of them, and for the first time after so many years Xiao did not care about the weight of karma he carried with him, only the weight of the guilt of the past remained between them.
He looked over his shoulders, Aether was still there, sitting there with his eyes closed, his breathing relaxed. The adeptus wanted to understand how the other young man could be so calm, while he, inside, had complete chaos.
He sighed wearily, trying to mentalize once again why he was there: he was doing it for Lumine. He repeated it to himself over and over again, it was only for her.
He just had to convince Aether to go back, because his sister was worried. He would return to the Wangshu Inn and try to keep as much distance as possible. That way, perhaps, in time the non-existent relationship between the two could improve and at some point they would get together to put an end to that past that somehow still tied them together in such a painful way.
With that thought constantly replaying in his head, the adeptus took enough courage to approach the blond once again.
─ So... ─Xiao cleared his throat, still slightly uncomfortable.─ Aether.
His voice sounded relaxed, but there was a trace of hidden pleading. As if desperately asking him to open his eyes and let him lose himself in that bright amber gaze. However, the one who once ruled the abyss gave no sign of wanting to answer the call.
The adeptus did not know it, but Aether was not only fighting against his own feelings, but also against internal wounds that had not yet fully healed. The stabbing pain was unbearable, his belly burned and nausea churned his stomach.
─ Xiao... ─His voice came out in a soft whisper. It was strange to call him that way, for the Yaksha it was also strange to hear that name directly from the blond.─ What are you doing here?
Xiao hesitated before answering. He sat, then, next to her, leaning his back against the tree.
─ Lumine and Paimon were worried about you; they looked for you for a long time, but couldn't find you. I figured you might be here, that's why I came for you.
─ Hmn. ─In the past, the person next to him hardly uttered more than three words in a single sentence. Aether watched him carefully, delighting in the other's voice.─ I've always liked coming here, the place is nice and it helps me to be calm.
The adeptus turned his face in his direction and their gazes met once more. Was there something hidden in Aether's words or was it just his imagination? To him it had been a clear hint that I was waiting for you, but he quickly dismissed it.
─ I'm sorry, it was my fault....
─ Your fault? ─The blond interrupted him and then denied.─ It's not like that. The only one to blame is me, for not knowing how to handle the situation. I was very surprised to have seen you after so many years and not knowing how to deal with you, I just ran away. ─She let out a soft laugh and watched the sun starting to set on the horizon.─ Now, because of that, even my sister is worried about me.
But Xiao's words were deeper, the forgiveness he sought was not only for what happened the night before. Aether was also aware of it, but she preferred to pretend she didn't understand.
─ Sora... ─At that name, the blond trembled slightly and once again looked at the adeptus. Xiao had a complicated expression and didn't know exactly how he should start speaking.
However, to Aether it was like an open book that he had read over and over again throughout his life. His hand came to rest on the opposite one and he held it tightly.
With a look full of melancholy, he spoke.─ I don't need to tell you, do I? My real name was never that, it's not necessary for you to address me that way, I'm Aether.
─ I don't mind. ─A surprised eyes watched him.─ to me you will always be Sora. And, I... ─Xiao hated that side of him; that part that wouldn't let him express himself the way he wanted to. Even having Aether in front of him; even knowing it was just the two of them, he had a hard enough time putting his emotions into words.─ What happened that day....
The blond raised a hand to stop him from speaking further.─ Enough, none of this is necessary. Xiao, that's in the past, it happened so many years ago that it's not even necessary to talk about it. I know you didn't mean to do it, that's more than enough for me, I've long since forgiven you.....
─ But...
Aether quickly denied and didn't give him a chance to protest.─ We've both gone back to making our lives our own way. I made a lot of mistakes and you hindered your freedom, I'm happy about that. You're with my sister now, and it's something that makes me pretty happy too, because I know Lumine is with someone who will take care of her no matter what. You don't have to get stuck on something that happened so long ago, just let everything stay where it should and keep moving forward as you have done so far.
Xiao watched him in complete silence. Aether was still talking and despite having a smile on her face, with everything she was saying, her eyes reflected a deep sadness and tears were slowly peeking out. When her voice began to crack, she abruptly stopped talking and bit her lower lip.
That fake smile was painful for the dark-stranded one. He reached out his hand and gently caressed the blond's lips.─ Don't do that, you're going to hurt yourself.
Aether watched him momentarily, before closing her eyes and losing herself in the warm touch of her companion.─ Please, from now on... take good care of my sister and make her happy.
How was he supposed to refuse? That was his way of indicating that the conversation had come to an end. Remembering that boy from the past, Xiao knew he wouldn't keep talking no matter what she told him.
So she just sighed with resignation.
She had to admit that he was absolutely right. They were supposed to put the past behind them and focus on the future, but there was still something that bothered Xiao. However, she could only accept this reality, painful as it was.
Feigning indifference, he replied.─ Let's go back, it's getting late.
He quickly stood up and turned his back to the blond, moving forward slowly.
Aether's hand reached out in the air, wanting to reach for him, but he retracted it slowly.─ Hmn.
Only when Xiao was far enough away, the expression on the blond's face changed. The intense pain was becoming more and more unbearable, he put pressure on his belly with his hands and bit his lip hard to stifle a moan of pain.
Her breathing became irregular, but she still did her best to stand up. He didn't want anyone to worry about him, he knew that these were the consequences of his own actions; Baizhu had told him that his wounds were still delicate and that he shouldn't overexert himself in any way, and yet he had walked halfway across Liyue to get there.
Xiao hadn't noticed at first, it was only when he realized that the other young man wasn't following him that he stopped and turned in his direction.
Aether had leaned against the tree until he stood up, his arms and legs were weak, trembling slightly as they had to support his weight. However, he couldn't even take a single step, a sharp pang made him curve forward. His eyes were full of confusion, as soon as he watched the blood dripping against the ground. He raised his hand and brought it up to his mouth; thick and warm, the crimson filled his vision and it quickly became blurry.
Everything around him seemed to spin, and soon he was unable to stand. His body felt too heavy, and his consciousness began to fade. As soon as Xiao turned in his direction, he could only watch as he slowly slid against the tree he had used for support.
Before he became completely unconscious, Aether could only hear someone shouting his name in despair.