When I woke up I still felt heavy. I was awake but it was as if I was still asleep. I couldn’t bring myself to speak, or even move for that matter.
I could see though. It was beautiful. The sun was peeking through the trees. I began to feel the dirt on my fingertips. When I lay like this I can’t help but feel at peace.
At this moment I belong to nature.
I feel a soft thump on my chest. A soft mew. Charcoal rubbed his head under my chin.
I finally attempt to move my hands. When They move I push myself up. Char moves to my lap.
What time is it?
Suddenly it hit me, it shouldn’t be this light.
I curse to myself. I’m going to be in so much trouble. I never finished getting all of the water this morning. Or any of my other morning chores for that matter.
As soon as I stand I can’t help but sway. Pain pulses in my neck and my head. I lean on the tree. I look around for the mystery man
I don’t see him. Maybe he had gotten what he needed. I take a deep breath. I need to pull myself together, the longer I wait the more I’ll be punished.
With the visit there were already more servants, but that still didn’t dismiss my own work. I walk away from the tree. I look at all of the small animals. I will come back and give them a proper burial. It’s not right that their lives were taken so soon. They deserve a way to rest.
I begin to walk. I feel heavier than normal.
I need to pick myself up. When I get to the clearing, the sun is too bright. It was probably just before noon. I peer at the sky. Blue skies, bright blue.
My hand held a shadow over my face. My sleeve seemed to be ripped. I would have to fix it, right now wasn’t the time. I needed to face the head of the household. Tell him what happened and-
Wait.
People were clearly trying to kill that man. I don’t know what he’s done. I know more than anything the rules of this world aren’t always fair. Most of the time they don’t even give a chance to explain. When I lived on the streets I experienced it first hand.
People would have their hands chopped for an accusation of stealing. Many times they were innocent, but you can’t replace missing appendages. I shudder.
I can’t tell them, not until he explains.
“Char, I need you to wait in the barn.” In a sense of understanding he runs off. I allow my hair to cover my marks. I moved to the house. Sneaking carefully into the kitchen.
There were more people than I expected. They all moved completely ignoring me. It’s not until I see young Bella I feel it. She rushes to my side.
“Sapphire!”She exclaims loudly. I feel eyes glance my way. The name was given to me by her. She gave me the name after learning about the gemstones. She thought my eyes looked similar to the stone. “I looked all over for you this morning. You didn’t finish your chores Mother is upset. Father needs to see you in his office. They told me to find you. What happened?”
I think of the best excuse I can think of.
“I’m sorry miss Bella. I passed out just beyond the river when I was gathering water.” She gasped. “Are you hurt?” She yanked my arm lower so she could inspect me.
“Miss Bella I’m alright. I may not be after I speak with your father.” Young Bella had grown attached to me. It’s one of the only other reasons I can get away with so much. She had long blond curls, the color to match her fathers. Her curls looked just like her mothers. The older sisters had the brown hair to match their mother, yet it was straightened, not a piece ever out of place, similar to their father.
They all had red eyes. All cursed ones have the red eyes.
Hiking up all of the stairs I feel light headed once more. I lean on the wall for support. I try to match her pace but she ends up dragging me most of the way.
When we finally stop in front of the huge doors I look up. Bella releases my hand and charges into the room with no hesitation. I wait just beyond.
I hesitate before I knock. The heavy pit inside my stomach as I begin to feel nauseated. “Come in.” The voice is enough to send shivers down my spine. I curtsy in front of him. I grip the sides of my dress in fear. The fabric was rough and thin, yet still brought comfort.
“Raise your head. What happened this morning?”
“I’m sorry sir I was fetching the water this morning and I lost consciousness. When I woke up it was already noon.” He sighed.
“My wife is furious. The girls were late getting ready this morning. I understand you didn’t mean for it to happen but there needs to be some sort of punishment-”
“Daddy! Please no!!” She pleaded with him.
“Bella. Your mother will not allow for this. It’s only because I know you love her I will make it only a couple of lashings.” His voice was firm. I could hear her sobs.
“I’ll even give her the rest of the day to recover. You know your mother. If it was up to her she would have her head. The king is in town. Her tardiness slowed the progress of your sisters. The king has three sons and all are eligible bachelors. If we make a good impression then we can be in good standings, better than where we are now.” I could still hear Bella’s sobs. They were muffled. I’m sure it’s because she had her head buried in her father’s chest.
“I accept my punishment. I’m sorry sir.” I nod my head and curtsy.
“We will do it in the courtyard. I have already gotten the men to do it. Remember you get all of the rest of today and tomorrow alright?” It seemed as if he was trying to comfort Bella. I turn and I walk forward.
I move out the back of the house. I felt sick. I don’t know how I kept a calm composure. My hands were shaking. When I knew I was out of sight I covered my mouth. I needed to cover the sobs.
With my other hand I grasped my chest. The fear was overwhelming. I need to be strong. This is my life. This is how things are in this world.
I move down the stairs. When I approached the courtyard, it was as if they were waiting. Arms gripped mine, they dragged me forward.
There weren’t many people. The few who were there stared. The eyes that I could pick out were those of the wife and daughters. I bit my lip. Easily it began to bleed. I had forgotten.
I remember the man.
I should be mad, instead I’m filled with concern. He was gone and I hoped that he was alright. I hadn’t fully seen him but I remember the taste of his lips on mine. The only reason they had been there was because of the blood.
He was desperate he sucked what was on my lips. Even though it was subtle in a way it brought me relief in that moment.
There was no longer any pain.
They tie my hands in front of me. Then cut the back of my dress open. In a way the feeling of the cool blade made me know it was real. I could hear the slicing of the fabric.
I closed my eyes. I heard it before I felt it. I had to bite down to prevent myself from screaming. A slashing for every hour I was late.
It meant 6 lashes. 5.
I tried to think of anything else. I tried not to think of the cruelty.
4.
Why was I born like this? I wish I had been born a cursed one. To make others suffer.
3.
I wouldn’t be like them. I would care for the others who were lesser than me.
2.
Maybe that was why I was born the way that I was. The cursed weren’t able to feel empathy.
1.
I can’t say that for sure. At this moment I feel as if it’s true. The mother looks down on me. I make eye contact for the final lashing.
She doesn’t blink. Yet it’s almost as if she enjoys seeing me in pain. As soon as the final lashing is complete people leave. She stands for only a moment before she breaks eye contact and leaves.
They unlock the chains. I remain against the post. The pain was too much.
What was only a few moments felt like an eternity.
I needed to clean the wounds. I got to my feet, I moved slowly.
It hurt so bad. I concentrated on moving one foot in front of the other. I feel as if I’m about to die. The pain was the worst I’ve ever felt.
I hear the water before I see it. Once I see it I’m quick to remove what's left of my dress. I walk in carefully. I finally let the scream escape when the water touches the open wound.
I don’t cover my sobs.
My breath was ragged. I try to lower myself. It hurts.
“Pain is only temporary. There will be a time when you will be at peace. Pain makes you stronger.” I whisper the words to myself.
I close my eyes. Breathe.
With each breath the pain goes away.
I looked to the other side of the river, the dead animals still remained. I moved to the other side. I was careful. I set their bodies in the river. They slowly drifted.
I watched and wished they would be at peace.
A twig snapped and grabbed my attention.
---
I looked at her.
I don’t think she could understand how beautiful she was.
“What are you doing?” I asked her. She looked at me. I could see her eyes more clearly. Blue. They were beautiful. In all of my years I have never seen a color like those. It didn’t help that I was a shut in.
“I’m putting the animals you killed to rest. They deserve a proper burial. A place to be at peace. If I place them in the river then their souls can travel to where they would like to rest.” I couldn’t help but stare at her. She was so different.
She looked up at me. It’s weird people were normally so afraid of me. She didn’t seem to be. “How are you feeling?” She broke me from my train of thought.
“I’m sorry?”
“Oh I was just curious. Last time I saw you you were about to die and nearly killed me in the process.” She had a little of a bite in her. It makes sense you have to be strong in this world.
“Well there was something in your blood that really brought my strength up. I was able to steal some blood from a nearby home.” She seemed shocked.
“No. Don’t steal. What if that family needed it? I can give you blood just promise me you won’t steal!” She got closer to me. This girl was extremely powerful and I don’t think she knew it. She wasn’t wearing any clothing. I could feel a slight tightening in my gut.
Damn. I wanted her.
Maybe it’s because she didn’t seem to fear me. The scars are enough to scare most, but when people learn of my identity, they really run in fear.
I used to think that it was better to be feared, but I forgot what it was like to have a conversation with someone who didn’t care what I thought.
I look away from her. “I promise.” I muttered. She nodded.
“Good.” I couldn't help but smell blood. I knew it was hers. She sank in the water and it covered her bareness. I approached her.
“Did your wound reopen?” I pulled her closer to inspect where I had pierced her. It was still closed. Her lip has reopened, but that wouldn’t be strong enough of a smell. She pulled away.
“No, I was uh punished.” She sunk further into the water. She didn’t make eye contact. “When I passed out I wasn’t able to finish my morning chores. Normally it wouldn’t be a super big deal. The problem is the princes are in town and I supposedly slowed the process. If it wasn’t for Bella, the master's wife would’ve killed me long ago.” She spoke softly. It makes sense when you look at her I was surprised she wasn’t killed off. Beautiful women like her tend to be killed by jealous women. Their blood sold at a higher price with false pretense of beauty.
I move behind where I once laid dying. I had gathered some roots. I had studied plants at one point. It was how I knew what I was poisoned with. These roots would help heal her wounds.
“Let me help you.” She hesitated. You could tell all of the thoughts were flowing through her head as she debated with herself.
“Only if you tell me your name.” I ponder for a moment myself. I can’t give her my real name, but I’ll give her my undercover name.
“Duncan. And you are?”
“Sapphire.”
I smiled softly to myself. Her name fit her perfectly. Not only were her eyes that gorgeous blue, but she was just as rare as the blue gem. I couldn’t help but feel a pull towards her. I wanted to learn more about her. Wanted to spend time with her. I enjoyed her company. It feels as though the less she knows about me the better.
I wanted to protect her, but I still wanted to be around her. I know it’s selfish, but I can’t help myself.
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