Chapter 2
Flisety sank into her pile of bedding, releasing a quiet sigh of relief as her flank made contact with the leaves. They held a slight rough touch as they caught the skin beneath her fur, but she didn’t care for that. They were comfortable enough to sleep on, and right now that was all that mattered.
After meeting Kalia, the latter half of the day had consisted of a tidal wave of new places, new information, and a lot of conversation. While collecting the leaves she now lay on, they had only properly toured the Aest Ring, with most of their time spent talking -- or, in Flisety’s case, mostly listening. Kalia had described every little detail of the streets around them she could think of, before moving on to quizzing Flisety about how different Borelton was. At one point, she had even spent a good thirty minutes solely on the topic of mice.
Alone now in her new hut, Flisety snorted a laugh to herself. Kalia may have been exhausting to spend the day with, but also undeniably fun. Of all the wolves in Lunerda, she had to be the best to have as a neighbour.
Her laughter faded. And as a companion. A friend to temporarily replace the ache in her chest. The ache that had now returned in full force.
Flisety buried her snout in her bedding, failing to imagine it as a wolf’s flank pressed against hers. It didn’t have his warmth, or the beat of his heart. It couldn’t lean closer and whisper a faint joke in her ear, leaving them both giggling late into the night. It wasn’t the same. It never would be the same again.
Curling herself tighter, she hissed at the thoughts, driving their invasive presence away. It wasn’t the same. But it could be different. She fixed her mind on Kalia, and as her eyes slid closed, she assured herself that those differences weren’t all bad.
Fortunately, her tiredness pressed down on her with enough force to ease her into the comfortable blackness. Memories pricked at the edges of her consciousness. She pushed them away.
Not tonight. She wouldn’t think about him tonight.
She instead replayed her day to herself. The ride with Dysmas. The uncaring guard. The glittering rooftops. Kalia, and all her wonderful energy.
Yet in every scene, lurking in the shadows she hadn’t noticed at the time, a pair of eyes watched her. They glowed even in broad daylight. When she moved away, they followed her. With their movements, the darkness grew, until there was nothing but an empty void.
The eyes turned away, and she was alone. Dimly, she was aware of soft leaves at her paws, and the room she should be standing bolt upright in, but she saw only shadows.
Her claws dug into nothingness. I said not tonight.
From the darkness, somewhere far in the distance before her and yet directly behind, a voice called her name. But not her name, the one spelled in silver letters on her paw, the one gifted to her in the early days of the most recent Jardost. The name she hadn’t heard in almost a cyluh, until Kalia had uttered it a short time before.
“Fliss.”
Every fibre of that voice sliced through her, its soft edges sharp to her trembling paws. A will to run from it burned in her veins, yet a far deeper wish lodged in her heart kept her rooted in place.
His voice shouldn’t have chased her here. But it was impossible to escape when her very soul called to that lost sound.
Her jaw cracked open with a breath, a shout of his name forming in her throat. It seemed to crackle, singing her tongue the longer it remained there. She knew she had to quash it. She battled it, shoving it away, but fiery desire could not be fought.
Yet when she spoke, her words were silent as ash.
Only his voice rang out. “Fliss, why won’t you answer me?”
Because you’re not real, and you need to leave me alone. The thought was no match for what she tried and failed to speak aloud. Because I can’t.
“You look so beautiful, Fliss.”
Something broke within her. A growl built in her throat, and this time, her jaw was an open passage. It would allow her mind’s truths, not the lies of her heart. “Stop it.” The words trembled, and the void seemed to shake in sync.
“But Fliss, it’s me.” His voice, so raw, so tantalising there, in the space directly behind her. She whipped around, wild instinct to grab him and embrace him and push him away stinging in her claws. The darkness was empty, his voice the only strand of him left. “It’s Fixel. Your twin.”
“You--” Her throat felt dry. Scraping words from it seemed to stab at her insides. “You’re not Fixel. Fixel is dead.”
A feeble shout, yet one that crumpled her strength to stay upright. She collapsed, no impact meeting her chest. She could feel nothing at all in this dark.
There was a laugh. His laugh. The same gentle amusement, the same kind smile echoing in its every note. Yet as it echoed from the void’s unseen corners, it mocked her. Another reminder of what she could no longer have.
“Am I?” he asked her, humour still lacing his tone. “I’m here now. Is that not enough?”
A whimper escaped Flisety’s throat. She forced out a low, dying growl. “You’re not here. You’re not real.”
“I’m not real?” The laugh drained from his voice, hurt replacing it. “Do you really care so little for me?”
“Fixel.” The sound of his name shaped by her voice shook her chest. A tear, its damp touch faintly warm, slid down the side of her snout. “I care. So, so much. It hurts.” Like claws slicing at every bit of me.
The silence that followed sunk into her. She had wanted him to leave her alone. Now the void granted her wish, she longed for one more whisper of his voice.
“Fixel?” She climbed slowly to her paws, then paced in circles, the cry of his name never far from her tongue. She wouldn’t stop speaking it now, not until she found him. “Fixel!”
She froze.
Out of the darkness, the pair of eyes opened, so much closer this time. They glowed with violet light, deep and ferocious. There was no place to look but straight into the shadowy pupils. Inside them flashed memories.
A scream of her name. A slash of claws, a splatter of blood. A death.
“No,” Flisety choked out. She thought of pulling away, but she couldn’t. Her paws pressed her in place, her mind ordering her to watch. The eyes showed her the moment, the one she saw a thousand times a day, but in every horrible detail. The memory had never been clearer since the day it first arrived.
He was dying. He was dying all over again.
Her paws moved of their own accord. Her claws stretched out, their sting never greater. She pounced, snarling, fangs revealed as she charged for those violet eyes.
In a matter of moments, she would pierce that dark flesh. She was so close. Soon his blood would run through her claws to stain the dark void where he belonged. Soon she would show Fixel just how much she cared.
Claws latched into her side. She squirmed, but there was no escaping. Pinned in place, she could only swipe blindly, the dark fur untouchable. Always just out of reach.
Another voice, pitched high, shivered through the darkness. With it came a crack of light to chase away the violet glow. Then Flisety was falling, nothing but shadows to catch her, her claws still desperate to find those haunting eyes.
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