I looked up again from my introspection; Kim was there, waiting for me to give her permission to sit down. I nodded to her and went back to thinking, trying desperately to figure out what the prank she was setting me up for was. There had to be some joke she was playing on me, it just didn’t make sense otherwise. This is one of the few things the nasty voice in my head was always right about, so I knew there had to be something.
We were another two hours from our lunch stop, so I assumed I had at least that much time to figure out what her plot was. No one that attractive is nice to me just because… it just doesn’t happen. The jocks put her up to something or her friends were looking for someone to poke fun at, that had to be it.
“You know, I haven’t seen you around school much.” Kim tried to start the conversation.
I shrugged… crap, she’s right, I do that way too often. “Social circles. The hots don’t hang around the nots unless they have a reason.”
She giggled, causing me to glance her way. She seemed a little red in the face… issue putting on make up?
“So you think I’m hot?” she asked, flicking her eyes to me and back to her lap.
“I… guess? I mean, I don’t think you’re not hot…” I stammered. Crap, that’s her plan, make me look like an idiot and then everyone will laugh at me. I’m such an idiot!
She went quiet after that, which was likely not a good thing for me, but at least in quiet I could think. How the hell was I going to get out of this trap? How do I minimize the fallout from this? Where’s Chelsea when you need her, she would know what was going on… and she would stop it… like she did all those years ago. Like she does in that storybook.
Kim tried to make small talk a few times more, but I wasn’t going to fall for that again. I kept my answers non-committal and as monosyllabic as possible. Eventually she stopped and I put my music back on so I could gaze out the window without interruption.
We eventually hit our halfway point, the lunch spot. It was a fast food chain that offered cheap goods and quick service, you know the kind. I got my order put in, picked out a spot in a corner that could see all the doors entering and exiting the building, and sat there sipping my soda. I saw Brittany chatting with a few other girls and the jocks across the room, the coach was on his phone and smoking outside, and Kim was over with her gaggle of friends… still kind of flushed in the cheeks. I hope she’s not getting sick, I don’t want to catch anything because someone else was careless.
I ate, finished my drink, went to the facilities, and made my way back to my quiet corner. We still had another fifteen minutes before we had to climb back on the bus, so I pulled out my e-reader. I got about another two or three pages in and then a hand showed up between my eyes and the page I was on. I glanced up, caught a glimpse pale skin and part of a bra, and then I tilted my head to look at whoever was bent over the table to interrupt me.
“Don’t you ever get tired of being off by yourself?” Kim asked, meeting my gaze.
I shook my head, “Less chance for people to hurt me if I don’t interact with them. Can’t pick on someone who blends in with the scenery.”
That seemed to hit a nerve or something, because her face clouded over. It was that pity stare again. That one people give you because they feel bad for you for being a loser. The one right before they walk away to laugh at you.
“Don’t you have any friends on this trip?” she asked, her voice a little uneven.
I shook my head, “Closest would be Brittany. But she’s Chelsea’s friend, not mine… she’s just supposed to keep me out of trouble… or so she said she was told. And keeping the jocks as far from me as possible is probably the best way to do that.”
“Is… is Chelsea your girlfriend?” Kim asked, kind of put off again.
I gave her the “are you kidding me” look. “Chelsea is dating the varsity football quarterback, Tommy Higgins. There’s no way she would ever even consider going out with me. She puts up with me because we’ve know each other since forever ago, that’s all.”
“So you’re single then?” Kim’s voice sounded… hopeful? Oh crap, is she about to try dumping one of her friends who can’t get a date on me? I bet it’s a girl who isn’t here either, so I won’t have any kind of idea as to what she looks like.
“I’m not looking to date anyone right now.” I said, trying not to let the fear seep into my voice.
Kim crossed her arms and tilted her head, looking at me like she was trying to figure me out. “Is it because you’re saving yourself?”
“ALRIGHT STUDENTS! To the bus!” Coach shouted from the door before I could answer.
I grabbed my stuff, put my e-reader away, and dashed past Kim and the other students. I packed myself into the seat I had been in the last two times, and breathed a sigh of relief. There’s no way she would-
“You really like this seat, huh?” Kim said, sliding in next to me.
I didn’t know what to do then. My brain just totally blanked, and I didn’t know what to do. She was relentless. Whatever she was planning, I couldn’t even fathom. I just knew that it would inevitably be the end of me.
“You rushed over to get this seat, so I have to assume you’re particular about that kind of thing, right?” She continued.
I shook my head, curled in on myself again, and looked away. This isn’t happening, this isn’t happening, she’s not there, you’re having a bad dream.
She sighed, “You know, I almost thought you ran away because of something I said.”
I looked back, shook my head again, and went back to my window.
The bus started moving again, another hour and a half to the next rest stop, and then another two hours to our destination. I just had to survive without setting off any more of this girl’s traps for another three hours and change. I can do that.
“Tell me about Chelsea. You seemed pretty defensive when I asked if you two were dating.” Kim said, sounding… I could almost swear there was a hint of jealousy?
“Chelsea is my friends. That’s all there is to it. She stood up for me back in elementary. She basically just keeps me around to make sure I’m not getting picked on again. Like I said, she’s got Tommy. I’m not part of the equation.” I said, trying to keep a level tone.
Kim leaned in closer, “You like her don’t you? That’s why you’re not looking to dote, right? So when Tommy breaks her heart you’ll be there waiting in the wings, right?”
I shook my head violently, “No. That’s not… no. She would never date someone like me.”
“Someone like you?” Kim prompted.
I turned and glared at her, the stinging of tears starting to develop in my eyes, “A loser. Happy? I’m a fat, ugly, loser. Kept around because it’s funny to laugh at them behind their backs. Just… leave me alone.”
To my credit, I didn’t shout or raise my voice. I didn’t make a scene. I just curled as much as I possibly could into myself and my bag and fought back the tears threatening to escape. Kim didn’t make a move, didn’t touch me, and I don’t even know what she looked like after I said what I did because I turned away to try and hide the tears.
The rest of the ride to our next rest stop went on in silence. We got off, did the restroom thing, and I went to find the most secluded place I could again. I wasn’t going to let that horrid woman do anything else to hurt me. She can’t embarrass me if she can’t find me, she can’t hurt me if I don’t give her-
"Jace?"
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