I had a rough life. Well, I guess it wasn't that bad. My name is Lucas Tain Sullivan, but I go by Tain. I'm currently twenty three years old, but I guess I can talk about my past. Let's go back to when I was a kid.
"Lucas! Do you got it?" The male bellowed, holding his fishing rod. I looked over, struggling to hold up the rod. I was about six at the time. "N-No!" I squeaked out. He walked over, and crouched down behind me. He'd left his spot. "Here, like this." He helped me hold it. It was just one of those kids fishing rods with a disney character on it. Stupid thing. He'd helped me learn to fish. It was a nice time, just him and I. Too bad those didn't last.
We'd soon got home, my mom in the kitchen making lunch for the three of us. Dad and I'd ended up falling into the river while he tried to tickle me. The both of us were soaked. "Oh my gosh, why are you all wet?" My mom ran over to me. "Daddy and I fell into the water." I shivered, but grinned. "Come here, lets get you into the bath. Arthur, honey, can you keep a watch on the food for a few seconds?" Dad nodded, and mom went to help me get a bath started.
Soon enough, I was ten. My mom was pregnant, and she wasn't due until January. However, as we were getting ready to open presents...her water broke. She went into labor. Dad drove us to the hospital, where my mom gave birth to my little sister before...she died. My mom didn't make it out of the hospital. My dad was extremely upset. Depressed. I was the one who took care of Lizzie from that point.
My dad began drinking. Getting abusive. I have the marks on my back to prove it. It wasn't until sophomore year that I thought about jumping off the roof of the school. I was up on the roof one day, staring over the edge. It was after hours. I was only staying for band practice, but I left because I said I needed some air. I set my hands on the railing. Without a second thought, I climbed over the railing and leaned a bit onto it as I stood on the edge. Just as I went to let go, someone grabbed my sleeve and pulled me back over. "Are you nuts?!" The voice was familiar. I looked up, seeing Him.
Darien Blackwater. He wasn't popular or anything, quite the opposite actually. "What made you think jumping was a good idea band kid?" I sat up a bit, before looking away. His expression softened, and he set his hands on my cheeks. Darien was a senior that year. He slowly lifted my head. "Hey.." He said softly. "C'mon, let's ditch. You need to get out of here." He helped me to my feet, and pulled me out of the school building. "I-I need to grab my bag and stuff." I pulled from his grasp. "Plus my dad-" He turned to face me. "What about him?" I hesitated. "Nevermind. Let me grab my bag." I walked inside, snuck into the band room, and grabbed my bag before disappearing out the from again.
Darien took me to the little cafe we have not far from my house. "What do you want? I'll pay." I hesitated. "N-No, I can pay." He put up his hand. "Just tell me what you want." I told him, and moved off to the side as he paid for everything. We grabbed our stuff and sat in the back, away from everyone else. "So, why did you try to jump?" He spoke up after a few minutes. I nearly choked on my chocolate milk. "W-Well.." I looked at the glass. "I-I can't tell you." I spoke softly. "Why not?" I took another sip of my drink. "I'll get in even more trouble if I do." I spoke up. "Please stop asking about it." He pulled something from his bag. "Here." It was a beanie. I slowly took it. As I finished up, he stood and held out his hand. "C'mon, let's go."
I walked with him, and paused seeing my dad standing outside. I pulled Darien back before dad spotted us. "Don't say bye to me, don't say anything. Just walk by. Don't even stare. It's trouble." He paused, before nodding. I tucked the beanie into my bag, before walking towards the house. "Lucas, there you are." I nodded. "Yes sir. Band practice was tonight." Dad raised an eyebrow. "Get inside. Dinner wont cook itself." I nodded. "Yes sir."
It was like that for two more years. Darien still came around to hang out. We'd actually started dating when I was a junior. "Lucas!!" My dad yelled. I quickly climbed out of bed and pretended to be pulling out clothes as he barged in. "Yes sir?" I turned towards him. "Just making sure you're awake." He grumbled. "Hurry up." I nodded. "Yes sir." One of these days, I was going to snap. He'd beat up on Lizzie sometimes too. It just made me so angry. I walked downstairs after changing, before starting up breakfast. "Is that thug coming around today?" Dad growled from the chair in the living room. "Not to my knowledge, sir." Yeah, to him D was a thug to dad, but so was everyone else. I finished breakfast, and served him his food. "Your sister is going to be gone today. You'd better leave today too." I nodded. "Yes sir." I walked upstairs to find Lizzie. She was hiding in her room. I brought her the food, before sitting next to her.
"Who are you hanging out with today Liz?" I asked. "Some friends from school." She wasn't very outspoken for an eight year old. "Okay, well I can drive you over there okay?" She nodded. Soon enough, I dropped her off and met at D's place. He lived alone, thankfully. Don't get me wrong, his parents are great, but still. I walked up to the door and unlocked the door with the spare key. "Darien?" I called out, shutting the door behind me and locking it. His fucking truck is here, so where is he?
"Tain!" Darien walked over and wrapped his arm around me. "How does it feel to finally be eighteen? You're an adult!" I smiled slightly. "Yeah yeah." I spoke up. It was the thirty first of October. I forgot. "So, what do you wanna do, birthday boy?" His arm went from my shoulders to my waist. "Oh my god you are so eager." I spoke up. He grinned. "You are an adult now." I rolled my eyes. "C'mon." We walked upstairs.
I'd gotten my flannel off when I froze and set my hand on his chest. "Wait, no I can't." He paused, before setting his hand against my cheek. "I'm not rushing you, you know that." His voice was gentle, soft. I leaned into his touch. "It's the scars. I don't want you to see them.." I whispered. "What scars- Tain.." He spoke softly. "Let me see them." I shook my head. "Lucas, please." I looked up at him. I hesitated. "Baby.." Darien wrapped his arms around me. "Come here Tain.." I clung to him. "I'm sorry...I'm sorry..." I repeated, letting him soothe me. Tears rolled down my face. I broke down against him.
After that? I'd started up baseball. One day, I'd come home to see my dad beating on Lizzie. I couldn't take it. "Hey." I growled. He turned. My dad was definitely taller than me, but I didn't care. "Liz, go upstairs." She ran upstairs. "What are you gonna do about it? Huh?" By this point, I'd colored my hair purple. My dad hated how I looked. Hated me. He continued to taunt and call me useless, until I slammed my bat into his face. "Shut." One hit. "The." Two hits. "Fuck." Three. "Up!" Four blows to the skull. I slammed my bat down a couple more times, before throwing my bat down and grabbing my phone.
I called D. He helped me bury dad's body, before we cleaned up everything and I grabbed Lizzie. "Come on kiddo, let's get out of here." I said softly. I'd gotten a cheap apartment, and I've lived there ever since. Just Liz and I, plus our two ferrets and our cat.
That's my story. I co-lead the cult with Darien, our leader and my boyfriend. Thanks for reading.
Comments (0)
See all